A Reflection of Us...

We met when we were just 18 and 20 years old; like most other young adults we were young and full of ambitious dreams. One of our favorite past times was camping; we spent many clear nights under the stars and moon laughing and chattering about our future together.

Never once did the word “Autism” enter our starlit dreams and midnight conversations.

No, instead we painted an ideal about our life together and our future children… They would be perfect, a combination of the two of us. They would have their father’s wit and my compassion splashed with our analytical natures.

…In the shadow of our youth, our relationship would be challenged as we faced autism together, but like anything else lay in our path we faced it together and became stronger than before it existed.

We no longer go camping in nature as there are too many obstacles that threaten our daughter’s safety. Instead, we pitch the tent in our backyard, with the comfort of home at our finger tips. Just this past Labor Day weekend, we lay awake under the moon in our backyard with our youngest daughter obsessively reciting scenes from Dora the Explorer.

I laid there listening to the non-stop chattering that has become comforting to me, thinking about how we have had to redefine our dreams and plan for an uncertain future. I am certain there are other couples who have been drafted into the autism journey that are no longer able to identify with the life they had before autism too. As often as I say the autism doesn’t define us, it has become a part of our identity, our lifestyle, and our future.

Today, I reflect on a young couple naively entering the journey of their lives with an uncertain future. Yet… through the hills of this journey we continue to adore each other. We still have quiet passion and humor. I am so relieved to share this journey with my best friend and lover. It is he who keeps me strong after days of no sleep, or hours of worry… it is he would supports me unconditionally to move forward with not only the autism, but anything I decide I want to explore and put my attention to.

I am grateful I can participate in life with this man of integrity, passion, and strength. And I know that if there is anyone who is going to help me conquer this thing in our life called autism, it is my husband. Together we unite and are better because of it…