Mother Rebel

I didn’t wake up one morning a mother rebel and decide to piss off all of my family and friends. In fact, I didn’t reveal my mothering style to anyone for many years (as it was a personal decision between my husband and me). It wasn’t until after I recorded my research and experiences in The Mother Consciousness that I started to openly talk about our lifestyle.

I entered my stance on holistic mothering with caution; researching as much literature that I could get my hands on. I have spent countless hours filtering through research articles, documents, online resources and books. I have read many different perspectives pertaining to different mothering and health practices. I have weighed out the facts, sifted through consequences, and rendered personal decisions.

I, also, put the energy forth to not take the inventory of other mothers whom views may differ from my own. However, I have made it my business to inform others about my findings… why?

Because… until I entered a conversation with a health care professional about vaccines, I didn’t know I had a right to question the constructs man had instituted upon mothers. I was naive to the mere fact that I had a right to make an educated mindful choice about the physical, emotional and spiritual well being of my off spring. After some self-discovery, I determined that I had the inherent right to raise my kids as I deemed in their best interest… even if that meant going against the grain. Empowered with knowledge and maternal instinct, I knew that some stranger in a white lab coat or Armani suit did not have the power to dictate how we were going to raise our children.

Man is fallible; if you want to know how I reached that conclusion read my book. In The Mother Consciousness I talk about the series of events that awakened the natural mother within me including the death of my father, the brutality of a cervical biopsy, being misinformed about the future of my ability to bear children, the sexual abuse in America, and more.

I do have a pet peeve with some of the mothers that have not made the decisions I have… not because they choose a different lifestyle, that is their right too. In all honesty, I usually keep my mouth shut about their practices in order to avoid the agonizing confrontation and I believe that you have the right to raise your kids how you see fit. However, after many discussions with other mothers who have similar perspectives and after talking with those who don’t, I conclude that many women in the holistic movement feel forced to defend their mothering philosophies.

I no longer have the energy to defend myself… until you have a child that is suspected to have a vaccine injury and until you have tried to participate in attachment / holistic mothering you cannot rationally condemn my perspectives. Frankly, if my mothering practices offend you, make you feel less than, or stimulate something uneasy in you, that is your issue not mine. Simply don’t read what I post here on my Alterna-mom blog, Twitter or Facebook. And certainly, don’t buy my book, The Mother Consciousness. I do not force this life style (which takes much energy and focus) on anyone. But, as a wellness educator, I will inform you so that you too can make an educated decision. And if that decision is different than the one I’d make, that is okay, because you made it mindfully.

I decided not vaccinate my children before autism was intimately in our lives.

I do associate the 3 injections of a vaccine they mandated I take because of my Rh negative blood to my daughter’s autism.

I understand that to vaccinate is a choice, not something that doctors or government should mandate or force you to do.

I believe it is illogical to put thimersol into a pregnant or lactating woman.

I acknowledge that natural immunity is far superior to the toxins forced into your infant and child’s body.

I question the effects of the mother’s vaccination history on her offspring.

I do think the breast is best.

I advocate that women nurse their children beyond infancy; the world average is 4 years.

I think it is normal for women to tandem nurse siblings that have resulted from single births.

I know the home is the best place to birth during an uncomplicated labor and delivery.

I correlate medication and institutionalized birthing to the pestilence of sickness among our children.

If I had had a son I would have left him whole and intact the way our creator intended him to be.

I think co-sleeping with your child fosters trust and security.

I know that the power that created the body has the power to heal the body.

I trust that a fever is an expression of health.

I understand that when a mother works away from the children they are exposed to possible abuse and neglect.

I know the mother is the best caregiver for her children.

If you are in alignment of my views, I am glad we have connected and look forward to expanding our Mother Consciousness together. If you are intrigued I am glad you have an open mind and invite you to learn more. If you cannot relate to any of this simply hit the x button, turn away and move on… don’t try to convince me my views are wrong and in return, I will not disrespect your views; let’s simply agree to disagree.

Read More

5 Years Ago I Gave Birth To My Sunshine Girl!

As Sahara's birthday quickly approaches I find myself thinking about her birth. I can't believe it has been five years since my baby was born... where has the time gone? Anyways, in order to avoid my thoughts turning to how old I am getting I have decided to post a small excerpt from The Mother Consciousness about this birth experience....

"...Five days after my due date, we had the luxury of calling the midwives into the comfort of our home. I had been asleep for a couple of hours when I was awakened with the sensation to urinate. When I returned to bed I lay quietly next to my sleeping daughter. Focused on the tightening of my belly, I wondered if this was the beginning of true labor. When labor began with my first pregnancy it was obvious; my water broke and stage two labor contractions were upon me. This time I didn’t feel much urgency and birthing in the comfort of our home I was in no rush to go anywhere.

"When my husband heard me making a soft low pitched groan he decided he should call the midwives. He said he had only heard that sound once before and that was right before our first daughter was birthed. I was still unsure I was in labor even as the mid-wives arrived with my daughter yelling out the window, “Mommy’s having the baby! Mommy’s having the baby!” She jumped back into bed with excitement and I soon found myself, again, concentrating on the colors of the rainbow. I was birthing our second daughter in the comfort of my own bed just two hours and 50 minutes after I had awakened to go to the bathroom. With my husband on one side of me and my daughter on the other—this was surely a family moment to be cherished for eternity.

"In the quiet of the night we bonded with our newest family member. When my older daughter assisted the midwives in cutting the umbilical cord she joyfully declared, “Sister, I am making your belly button.” I then showered as she helped the midwives make the bed and dress her new baby sister. After the midwives packed up and left, my new family of four drifted off to an entire night of peaceful sleep. "

Happy Early Birthday, Sunshine Girl!!

Read More

Reflection on the Sacredness of Childbirth

An excerpt from The Mother Consciousness:


I soon found myself attending a woman’s group where I sat passively listening to a dialogue about pregnancy and birth experiences. “Why is it,” I wondered, “that every time someone found out that you were expecting they had to share their opinion on the topic?” As I listened further, I began to understand that the childbearing experience often was what someone else had dictated it to be. Many mothers mindlessly accepted other’s perceptions simply as their own.

On that particular night the topic covered planning nonemergency C-sections to orchestrate their infant’s birth around their husbands’ time off and opting for an epidural. “How barbaric is it that anyone would refuse an epidural? She would have to be sadistic or something, wouldn’t she?” complained one woman who had just found out that she, too, was pregnant with her first child. Just a few weeks pregnant and already she knew that she would opt for the epidural. Here I was, well into my fifth month, still exploring what the childbirth experience would look like for me.

I was diligently weighing my options, battling with what culture said was the right thing to do while having this conflicting innate pull to create a unique natural birth story for our unborn child. I found myself realizing that these women could not even consider for a moment that the birthing process was a part of the rite of passage into their motherhood. They sat there discussing this as a routine medical procedure while I sat there stupefied, almost enraged, that none of them considered the sacredness of the birthing process.

Read More

My Maternal Voice Saved My Daughter's Life

Every June, as I prepare birthday invitations, I pause and offer gratitude for finding my maternal voice. This innate response saved my daughters life.... (excerpt from The Mother Consciousness)

...Then sure enough, just four days later, we were told by our obstetrician the crushing news that there was no fetus in the embryonic sac. He ordered blood work to be done and said, “We should see the hormone levels go down over the next week.” We were devastated. My dreams of becoming a mother were about to be fulfilled and then, once again, stolen from me! The days that followed were long and full of grief.

At our next appointment the obstetrician said what we had feared the most—the hormone levels had decreased by more than 3000 and that reflected a miscarriage. As if trying to comfort us he said, “Most pregnancies end this way and the parents never even knew that they were pregnant.” He continued, “This is the body’s way of getting rid of a fetus that was not healthy to begin with or malformed.”

He then lectured about doing a D&C versus allowing the body to naturally abort the pregnancy. As my husband and I looked at each other, we could tell this was a routine lecture he had given to many patients before us.

[Somewhere in the depths of my existence I had my first maternal instinct whisper to me, “What if he is wrong?” This split second thought would change my life forever!]

It was in that moment that I had found myself outwardly questioning the authority that I had blindly accepted as my truth the first two decades of my life. It was in this flash of time that I considered that this doctor and his tests could be wrong. With my husband at my side, I sheepishly said, “What if you’re wrong?”

Quick glances were exchanged between the doctor and the nurse, “Mrs. Richardson, I know this must be difficult…” He talked about being a Christian and how he would never recommend a D&C without just cause. There he stood telling us about his stance on abortion and how he would not recommend this procedure unless he was absolutely 100 percent certain that the pregnancy had already been terminated.

[Could the ancestral mothers have been listening to my silent cries for a miracle? Did I feel their wisdom in my cells or hear them in the recess of my mind?]

My husband supported my outward questioning of this doctor’s authority by firmly requesting another ultrasound. As they begrudgingly prepared for the procedure, I laid there, once again in the cold blue crinkled paper gown, in profound silence. I held my breath as we stared at the screen. My husband stood by my side caressing my hand. Minutes seemed to be suspended in time.

Then suddenly, there was a rhythmic movement in the middle of the screen within the very sac that just a week ago appeared empty. Stunned—we watched our daughter’s heart beat for the first time. Again, more quick glances were passed around the room as I let go of my breath. The doctor quickly said, “I guess I will see you in a month.” He abruptly left the room with no apology or explanation regarding the agonizing experience we had just painstakingly endured.

(My Daughter will celebrate her 10th birthday next weekend! Happy Birthday Angel-Girl!)

Read More

The Mother Consciousness

It is time for us to reclaim our innate rights and restore our instincts as they guide us towards true health and security for the children of the today and of the future.

We must reinvest in the natural development of our children behaviorally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

Read More

A Natural Birth Meditation, The Rainbow

Excerpt from The Mother Consciousness, Chapter 2 Natural Childbirth

“ I shifted in and out of different positions until I discovered the one that worked best for me. I found myself lying on my side, in the fetal position, with the comfort and safety of my husband whispering in my ear— intimate words reserved just for me. He, then, gently reminded me to focus on the colors of the rainbow bringing me into the meditation I found most relaxing during our practice sessions at home.

“I started with red and found myself enveloped in deep red roses – the smell of roses always reminded me of my maternal grandmother. I drifted to orange and focused on the warmth of the sun bathing over me – ebbing over my contractions. Yellow slipped in and I saw myself swaddled in a warm yellow fuzzy blanket – cozy, comfortable, drifting to green. The smell of fresh cut green grass in the spring entered my awareness as the blue of the sky swirled above and around me. I was floating on the clouds while I heard my husband’s comforting breath in rhythm of my own. The blue sky vaporized and I found myself in a field of purple lilacs bringing me back to my childhood. The aroma was pleasant, and led me to the memory of my maternal grandmother’s face – I could see the wrinkled distant wisdom in her eyes, comforting me. I found the strength to lift myself up into the squatting position.

[Or did my grandmother guide me?]”

Read More