Book Review: The Power of Intention

The Power of Intention – Gift Edition

Learning to Co-create Your World Your Way

By Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

I was first introduced to Dr. Wayne Dyer many years ago through his public television broadcast of The Power of Intention. I found Dr. Dyer to be articulate, heart centered, peaceful and charming as he thoughtfully spoke his words, “Intention is a force in the universe, and everything and everyone is connected to this invisible force.”

My life was instantly transformed as I integrated The Power of Intention into my own personal life. Specifically, The Seven Faces of Intention impacted my daily actions and thoughts, fostering great change within me— Creativity, Kindness, Love, Beauty, Expansiveness, Abundance and Receptivity. These are powerful concepts that can create profound shifts for anyone when mindfully implemented.

As I re-read the 2010 gift edition of this unparalleled work, those seven concepts elicited a feeling of peace and harmony within the core of my being. I became aware of how much over the years I unconsciously integrated these Faces Of Intention into my own personal daily practices. In particular, I began to distinguish how much Dr. Dyer’s work had influenced my style of mothering…. I keenly became aware of the way in which I intended opportunities, growth, expansion and health within my young children’s lives and how I have taught them core life values through The Power of Intention.

As I continue to nurture these concepts and values with my young children, I understand that they are receiving an extraordinary gift and a means to manifest and cultivate a purposeful life; unlocking a power within them to have control over their unknown futures. I enthusiastically recognize that The Source of creation is alive and expressing itself through these dynamic children, not just mine… but through all children.

I believe the most profound outcome I have experienced with The Power of Intention is in the realm of my perception of what it means to be a special needs mother. When my youngest daughter was diagnosed with infantile autism at age 4 ½ we had a difficult choice... We could either blindly accept the diagnosing psychologist’s perspective of our daughter having a future full of great difficulty OR create a life of unlimited potential and opportunity for her.

At the time of the diagnosis, my husband and I were told that our little girl would never to go college, work or live independently; that she would have immense limitations put on her level of socialization; and that her life would include no option for marriage nor children of her own. As if that wasn’t bad enough, we were told to prepare for a long complicated road ahead of us and to start making plans for a future that was certain to include group homes and a life time of non-verbal communication.

Alone and full of raw emotion, I cried for days about her uncertain future. Then on the third morning, during a meditation I had an epiphany… My daughter was exceptional beyond any label or prognosis forced upon her. This meant I was about to relinquish the perspective of the psychologist AND set into motion my own intentions about the magnificent fulfilling life she inherently deserved.

I immediately began meditating on the things I intended for my daughter… to find her way out of catatonia, to develop verbal communication, to long for touch, to socialize, to play with her older sister, to enter mainstream public education, etc… I began to see her doing these things in my meditations, I focused on the feelings of elation when I witnessed her tiny milestones, and I began to treat her as if she was exceptional beyond the label of autism… a perfect creation through God.

I expected miracles…. And we got them!

The invitation to review The Power of Intention presented itself at the perfect time in our lives. It has served as a gentle reminder of how powerful we all are and how all of our possibilities already reside within us. It has jogged my memory that there are no physical limitations. It has evoked gratitude about a time that I was rendered helpless… and how The Power of Intention turned our lives around in order to discover our daughter being an absolute expression of life!

Dr. Dyer has offered us effective tools to use along our personal journey; tools that have empowered us to not aim at curing our daughter of autism, but to soften the challenges that she experiences so that she may have a fantastic life of her choosing. Our shift in thought has opened the door to infinite opportunities for both of our children and selves.

The Power of Intention, Learning to Co-create Your World Your Way is a perfect read for not only parents of special children, but for anyone seeking change in their lives. Dr. Dyer offers specific tasks and steps to take to unleash the power within you to create that which you desire. Keep in mind, this isn’t a how to recipe style book, rather it is a unique piece of literature that guides you to look at life differently and to open yourself to take an active role in what you kind of life you have.

The Power of Intention is saturated with facts about this energy behind our thoughts and actions. In particular, the summarization of the 29 year research of Dr. David Hawkins is instrumental in the realization that this unseen vibrational force is the frequency that impacts and gives life to everything… including our thoughts, actions, and…. intentions.

Dr. Dyer does more than present these facts and ideas to us, he paints a unique picture through stories and quotes from poets, philosophers and modern day teachers. This collection of words illustrates to us the power of our thought, words and intent; that we can and do have the power within us that can create that which we desire. Dr. Dryer helps us realize that we can have an active role in what takes place in our lives.

Uniquely designed, each page brings the sensation of The Source alive through brilliant bursts of colors and inspirational art. This stunningly beautiful version of Dr. Dyer’s work serves as an excellent addition to your own personal collection or as a thoughtful gift to a loved one.

“Dr. Wayne W. Dyer is an internationally renowned author and speaker in the field of self-development. He is the author of more than 30 books, has created numerous audio programs and videos, and has appeared on thousands of television and radio shows. www.DrWayneDyer.com”

Hay House

Amazon

Barnes & Nobel

Chapters Indigo (Canada)

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Donation Ideas

If you are considering giving to charity as this year ends... please consider local charities or ones that you know where the money is going.

Many people ask if I support Autism Speaks... I do not. For the same reasons I do not buy pink ribbons and walk walks... I don't know where the money trail goes... well, I have my suspicions, but that is not for this post.

WHO DO I SUPPORT?

I support AWN and NZ... With these two organizations, I KNOW where the money trail is and what they are specifically doing to impact our global community.

Autism Womens Network (AWN) supports females on the spectrum and your donation would go towards hosting workshops across the US to educate and empower families like mine.

This community of autistic women have welcomed me, as a NT mother, into their community with open arms... I have developed a vested interest in their work. My goal is to empower other mothers like myself and young girls like my daughter. That simple! To donate click here.

NZ (Numinous Zoe) is a non-denominational, Christ centered church that has offered local resources for me to personally work with the autism community through spiritual and energetic mentorship. Your donation would help continue not only my mission & spiritual growth, but would support outreach to many who may not otherwise afford this alternative mode of care for their families and children. To donate contact Nathan at nnorris@numinouszoe.org

TY to both of these non-profit organizations... your personal support this year to my family and the autism community has been immeasurable!!

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Product Review: Getting Into The Vortex

Getting Into The Vortex

Guided Meditations CD and User Guide

By Esther and Jerry Hicks

Let me introduce you to Abraham.

The first thing you need to understand is that Abraham isn’t a person. Yes, that is correct, Abraham is not a person. Abraham is what Esther Hicks accesses while inspiring and motivating others to live a more balanced life through the Law of Attraction. Abraham is an energy source that has had many different labels throughout the ages. To Esther, Abraham is the vehicle in which she creates inspiration, hope and opportunity for all who participate in these teachings.

I am certain some will see this as hocus pocus, new age, metaphysical or possibly even blasphemous. However, I believe that none of that is accurate. In fact, I have found the teachings of Abraham to reinforce my relationship with and trust in God. If you look beyond the manner in which Esther presents her information … the messages that are left are consistently based in The Ultimate Vibrations of love, peace, joy and harmony.

In a time when the world is full of hate, disease, war and economic hardships this is an important message for all to hear.

And to keep in alignment with Alterna-Mom’s message, in a time when our children are experiencing challenges academically, emotionally, physically, and cognitively at an all time high, this is the perfect message to elicit strength and personal empowerment for mainstream parents.

Abraham offers hope and inspiration. Abraham teaches us how to get into a ‘place’ in which we can tap into our true potential and manifest solutions to our challenges. Abraham calls this place The Vortex. The Vortex is simply a meditative state in which we can find solutions to the difficulties in our lives. This isn’t a magical place or a placebo effect, but a meditative discipline in which the solutions can and often do surface.

In the teaching of Abraham, The Vortex is the place in which all things are created… in Christianity, we call this place prayer.

Abraham states that it is not necessary to meditate for more than 15 minutes per day. In fact, they say life is about living, not contemplating about living… and so Abraham has presented us with an effective tool, Getting into the Vortex Guided Meditations CD and User Guide, to teach us how to efficiently meditate and get into this Vortex where intention and creation occur.

In the Guided Meditations CD, Esther’s voice gently carries you through the meditations. Her voice is calm and soothing; eliciting an instant relaxation. Your breath seems to lose itself into the rhythm of the background music… ebbing in and out. Abraham tells us that this is the most important result of this tool; sitting still for 15 minutes a day allowing our breath to match the rhythm of the music on this CD. We do not have to understand what is being said. In fact, we do not have to alter anything in our daily routines, but to find time to be still and breathe.

The most prominent words to me throughout the Getting Into The Vortex CD is “Breathe in, Breathe out.”

In fact, since using this CD, I find myself saying these four words, “Breathe in, Breathe out,” often over my internal chatter during challenging moments. With that, I am able to easily re-center myself through the simple act of consciously breathing. It is in this connection that I remember “who-I-really-am” and remember to release control over many things I have no control over.

There are four tracks on this CD that can empower your life:

• General Well Being Meditation
• Financial Well Being Meditation
• Physical Well Being Meditation
• Relationship Well Being Meditation

Each is unique in verse, yet a similar presentation. I felt that this consistency allowed me to relax more quickly regardless of the track I was listening to. I also have found this to be a perfect way to incorporate meditation into your child’s life. Simply play the CD in the background while your child is playing, bathing or resting and observe subtle changes in the child’s Well Being.

If you are the left brain thinker (like me) that must know what each phrase means and how those words can educe profound change in your life, the User Guide will be a delightful reference book for you. This guide offers clarity. Abraham has elaborated on each phrase in this guide so that everyone can have a deeper understanding to what is being said and intended in this meditative tool.

If you are interested in learning more about Abraham, Esther and Jerry Hicks, or The Vortex, I suggest you look at the links below. This is a very powerful tool for your whole family to achieve all the benefits of basic meditation and much more!

Hay House

Amazon

Barnes & Nobel

Chapters Indigo (Canada)

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AWN: Crucial support to women, teens, girls and families on the autism spectrum

The Autism Women’s Network (AWN) offers crucial support to women, teens, girls and families on the autism spectrum... please take a moment today to read this and take action to let them know that not only does the autism community appreciate their efforts, but so do others.

For the past several months I have posted a link on my Facebook and Twitter page daily for the The Autism Women’s Network’s chance to win a $50,000 grant to help females on the autism spectrum in the Pepsi Refresh Project...

While this is a very important cause to me, I am sure that it is probable that many of my mainstream friends roll their eye as I continue to ask for their support! It is even likely that many will be relieved to hear this will be the last month that AWN will enter this contest.

Over the past few months, by participating in the self-driven need to promote this project, I have been warmly accepted as a mother representing her non-verbal six year old daughter among this community of self-advocates. As my interest in this project strengthened so did my report with several of the women from AWN.

I discuss why I value this project (HERE) and (HERE).

In short, I have a daughter on the spectrum that was not diagnosed until after years of pleading with professionals to listen. (I am certain that her gender played a role in the lack of attention to our continuous concerns.) I also recognize that females are underserved and represented in the presentation of the spectrum.

It isn’t that I ignore male issues on the autism spectrum; I just have a vested interest in female issues because that is my reality. My goal in supporting Autism Women’s Network is simple:

To get the support my children and I need on a personal level. And to globally help girls, teens and adult women (and their families) to get the support and education they need, to prevent abuse, and to promote early intervention for females.

So, how will this project help?

Project Overview:

The Autism Women's Network is unique in that it was founded by women on the autism spectrum. Our mission is to provide effective supports to autistic females of all ages through a sense of community, advocacy, and resources. AWN's Project FAIM ( F emale A utistic I nsight M entoring) workshops will be the 1st of its kind. We plan to set up 5 Project FAIM Workshops across the USA which will focus on qualities specific to females on the autism spectrum. Topics will include: peer supports, adolescence, adult life, relationships, vulnerabilities and successful communications. Project FAIM Workshops will include active supports and information for everyone (autistics, parents, educators, etc.) The participants will meet renowned autistic females whereby gaining valuable insight. We will secure the Autism Women's Network non-profit status so we can continue to provide Community Events, online Forum support & E-Mentoring as well as our AWN Radio Show.

This has already begun to come into fruition through the Pepsi Campaign…

Sharon daVanport, AWN executive director, told me that, “This campaign has put AWN in contact with dozens of organizations, fabulous community minded projects and wonderful men, women and children from coast to coast across the USA.”

Isn’t that exciting!?!?! Imagine how this will impact our autism community as a whole!!

Not only that, AWN has received 9 invitations (including me) to host workshops across the US!! “Most of the invitations have included travel, lodging, and offers of a place to host the events! AWN has almost doubled the number of workshops which the Pepsi Grant would have provided.”

Can it get any better? Well, yes it can…

Sharon said, “The grant funds we were allocating to establish AWN as a non-profit will be minimized. We've had another 501 3C step up and say that they will back AWN through the process of filing all Federal, State, and trademark documents to finalize our non-profit if we do not finish December in the Top 10!”

So it appears that AWN will be winners (2x over) at the end of December whether or not we finish in the top 10!

There are three ways to support this project if you would like to vote for AWN…

VOTE Daily:
(1) On Facebook ☛ http://bit.ly/akQc0P?
(2) Text 101500 to Pepsi at (73774)
(3) Online at: ☛ http://pep.si/eg1mOG

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Dr. Temple Grandin: Animal Behavior, The Autistic Brain and Inspiration!

Many people get excited about meeting their favorite rock star or movie star… not me, I wanted to meet a livestock behavior expert!!

You may ask, ‘Why on earth would Alterna-Mom, a mid-west special needs mom, be interested in livestock behavior?’. Well, I am not. And yet, ironically I completely am. See, Dr. Temple Grandin isn’t just the world’s most famous animal expert and livestock rights advocate, Dr. Grandin has also won the hearts of the global autism community through her self-advocacy and insights on how the autistic brain works. … yes, that is right a DOCTOR of animal science who has autism!! She unknowingly paved the way for many of us to see that our children and loved ones are exceptional beyond labels and can achieve anything they desire.

BUSTING MYTHS

Dr. Grandin was diagnosed at age 3 ½ with non-verbal autism (infantile schizophrenia). The doctors wanted to institutionalize her, because, frankly, that is all they knew how to do back then. In her generation, it was common to ship off the children that were ‘different’, however having an independent thinking and educated mother who saw potential when no one else did, Temple was given proper early intervention and support which has cultivated a drive within her like none I have seen. Temple is a confident, successful and witty business woman and autism/animal rights advocate.

Busting the myths of autism, Temple and her Mother, with sweat and tears, were able to give Temple the tools she needed to become all she is today:

"Dr Grandin obtained her B.A. at Franklin Pierce College, her M.S. in Animal Science at Arizona State University and her Ph.D in Animal Science from the University of Illinois in 1989. Today she teaches courses on livestock behavior and facility design at Colorado State University and consults with the livestock industry on animal welfare.

Dr. Grandin has appeared on television shows such as 20/20, 48 Hours, CNN Larry King Live, PrimeTime Live, the Today Show, and many shows in other countries. She has been featured in People Magazine, the New York Times, Forbes, U.S. News and World Report, Time Magazine, the New York Times book review, and Discover magazine. She has also authored over 400 articles in both scientific journals and livestock periodicals. Her books 'Animals in Translation' and 'Animals Make Us Human' were both on the New York Times best seller list. 'Animals Make Us Human' was also on the Canadian best seller list.

In 2010, Time Magazine named her one of the 100 most influential people." ~ Michele Gwynn

When a friend informed me that Dr. Temple Grandin, Ph. D. was coming to Ohio State University to talk about dog and horse behavior, I was determined to see her. This is my personal reaction to that evenings presentation.

LIVESTOCK, PUPPY MILLS AND ANIMAL BEHAVIOR

Dr. Grandin’s presentation on animal behavior was intriguing. Every insight she shared… seemed common sense. However, she diligently expressed that when we are in the moment of behavior issues with our pet and livestock it is hard to step aside and see the details that might be triggering the behavior. (Kind of like our kids, don’t’ you think? How many times do we find ourselves wondering, “That was so obvious, why didn’t I think of that?”)

The presentation covered the horror of Ohio being the Puppy Mill Capital of the United States (alarming!!) and that Ohio is 1 of 15 states where it is still legal to auction dogs (sad!!)… The take home message was this: DON’T BUY DOGS/PETS!! Go to a rescue or humane society to adopt… this will put puppy mills and breeders out of business. Aside the fact that we have too many dogs already in the world without homes, I couldn’t conceptualize why we purchase and purposely breed even more? This part of the night was shocking to me. The local groups that sponsored this event shared horror stories about puppy mills and breeding… I don’t want to share those raw details here, but it is down-right tragic and cruel!

Dr. Grandin talked about breeding and genetics. When we try to breed for the best and strongest genes/traits we also get unexpected discrepancies… the best way for me to summarize the ironic message here is that when we try to create superior breeds we end up with the weakest: physical and behavior issues are emerging at an all time high because of breeders interfering with and breeding for the best traits like blue eyes and fertility. Dr. Grandin says that if you want a fancy breed of dog… for instance the Golden-Doodle… Firstly, only get one from someone that can present the mother to you… if the mother isn’t present, don’t get the dog. Secondly, make sure it is a first generation Golden-Doodle… with one parent being a Poodle and the other a Golden Retriever.

The last take home message on this topic was too “test drive before you buy” so to speak. Just because some kids have had success with pets, doesn’t mean all will. Make sure the pet is a good match for child as well as the pet.

THE AUTISTIC BRAIN AND ENABLING

Dr. Grandin has raised the bar with animal care in the livestock industry and she has studied the behavior of animals most of her life. More amazingly, she has been able to give us a peep into the mind of an autistic. This has given Dr. Grandin the rare opportunity to educate the world about the similarity between thought patterns of autistics and animals.

Of course, I was pleased to hear Dr. Grandin talk about this topic (after all that was the main reason I wanted to come to this event). She talked about the autistic mind thinking in pictures and how the autistic mind, similar to an animal’s, categorizes everything. Her insights have helped me to understand my children better and left my tween walking away saying… you know that is how my brain works too. This opened the door to a fantastic conversation about the aspie traits we recognize within her and how this doesn’t change her core.

Dr. Grandin talked about how children today are not ‘pushed’ like she was. And although we have more supports and interventions than ever before, the parents and other significant others in the child’s life today, enable them use their condition as an excuse to not have responsibility and goals. She says that as long as a child can talk, make them talk for themselves. Make them get up at a descent hour and have a productive day. Make them accountable for all they do. Give them opportunities to cultivate the desires, interests and dreams. Don’t use the label “autism” for an excuse.

She further illustrated this point by acknowledging that as a child she loved going to the beach and letting sand drip through her hands… this simple, almost hypnotizing action, focused and soothed her (sound familiar?). However, she stated that if that was all she was allowed to do, then she wouldn’t have been giving the opportunities, skills and determination that lead her to the events in her life that brought her on the stage talking to us that evening. Because her mother pushed her beyond the stimming, she was able to become the successful woman that she is today.

TECHNOLOGY & SERENDIPITY

At one point, Dr. Grandin told several aspies in the audience to use the power of “Google” to open avenues for their own hopes and dreams… she said today’s generation have it very easy in comparison to the what it took her to accomplish her goals. Dr. Grandin said that with all the technology we have today (and gave credit to all the aspies who made THAT possible) that anyone anywhere could open doors easily. She referenced what I term as ‘serendipity’. She said to go out and meet people on social networking sites and present your own work and portfolio. She was adamant that if you met the right person doors would open for you…

(Side bar plug: So, I hope an editor or publishing house sees my blog/writing and someday picks me up… )

Speaking of plugs, Dr. Grandin talked about her HBO movie, Temple Grandin. I loved her enthusiasm and the beam in her eye when she relayed that every fact presented in the movie was accurate; if you want to know how an autistic mind thinks, watch her movie; if you want to know how a cattle chute or livestock yard is run, watch her movie; if you want to know her life story up until she was 30, watch her movie… I believe from observing her body language and the enthusiasm in her voice that she is very proud of not only this movie, but having had a hand in the making of it.

Another thing Temple was vocal about was her drawings. She adamantly stated that it took her 3 years of practice to draw cattle chutes in the manner that she can. And that the drawing in the boardroom during the movie, is an actual drawing of her’s.

CURE VS. RECOVERY

One mom in the audience even thanked her for the insight and inspiration that she offers so many of us! There were several apsies in the audience, one in which asked her about organizations like Autism Speaks. Dr. Grandin didn’t directly answer the question, but instead gave a 5 minute impromptu lecture against the curing of autism spectrum disorders.

She ended the mini lecture with 2 points:

1) If you cured every person who had autistic traits, we would no longer have any scientists or computer geeks to advance our world.

2) If you cured a person of their autistic traits, you would take a component of who they are at the core of their being away.

I have thought a lot about this point over the past 6 years. I do not want to cure my child of the unique abilities and attributes that make her her, but I do aim to soften the challenges that make life difficult. I want to address her functional expressive and receptive communication skills, her dietary needs, her delayed motor skills, her sleep disorder, her raw frustrations, and to curb her inherent need to flee to protect her from bodily harm. (… this list could go on.) However, beneath these challenges, there is a core within her existence… a witty, funny, determined, moody, intelligent, confident little girl that without a doubt will use some of her autism attributes to define her persona and create an exceptional woman who can and will be able to accomplish anything she so desires.

DIFFERENT, NOT LESS

I imagine this is what Temple’s mother meant when she said, “different, not less.” And as I watched this magnificent woman on stage talk with us, I saw how she was different; her rigid body movement, her deliberate gestures & need to put her hands in her pockets at specific moments, her articulation of words, her ability to recite the lecture she certainly was reading from the pictorial memory within her brain, her obsessive passion for animals and the consistent ability to relate the animal behavior to that of the autism. But, I also saw this woman who had a charming sense of humor, a passion for her animal mates, a sense of confidence as she articulated her mastery of the subject at hand, a sense of pride about her artistic skills, and the desire and ability to engage with the audience. Most importantly, I saw a woman (whom I respect and adore) present herself with all her little quirks and nuances with an aura of being exceptional beyond the label of autism.

I am proud to have Dr. Temple Grandin be a role model for my young girls. She was everything I expected her to be and more.

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Share the Gift of Simplicity and Ease With Those You Love...

Black Friday seems to contradict what ‘The Holiday Season’ is all about.

So, today I sit cozy and warm with my children while sipping hot tea and reflecting...

Over the past 6 years, I have learned to never take anything for granted… and that includes Christmas morning.

When you have a child who cannot comprehend why you allow a strange man in a costume come into your home in the middle of the night while you sleep OR have another child who is so catatonic that she cannot even open her own gifts… you have no choice but to recreate what the Holidays mean to you.

((For us, Commercialization and Idealization is far from the equation.))

Many of my own expectations have been calmed and put into perspective. I have surrendered “The Beaver Cleaver” Holiday to old re-runs… instead we have learned to make do with what we have and appreciate the little things. The most important thing (and this may seem cliche but it is true) is that we are together and offer unconditional love to one another.

I cringe when I think of the children exposed to too much commercialization at the holiday... and what message that sends to their expectations and sense of self. So, instead of Christmas Barbies and Gameboys... we construct homemade gifts. And instead of Reindeer and Santa cookies (loaded with artificial dyes and colors), we make a birthday cake and sing "Happy Birthday" to Jesus on Christmas Day.

I wish such simplicity to all families. To be in the moment of togetherness and pure unadulterated joy!! As we enter the Holiday Season, I suggest that you pause and allow ease into your life!! This alone could be the greatest gift you give to your child or loved ones... a more balanced you!!

Having said all of that, I know that my readers may still like a good deal for Black Friday... and the business woman in me will honor each of you too!! So, I am offering discounted gift certificates between now and Dec. 31 for my Energy / Meditation Work for Adults and Children. What better gift to give than something that will soothe the body, mind and spirit!

Adults Sessions ~ 60 minutes for $30 (50% Savings!)

Children Sessions ~ 30 Minutes for $15 (50% Savings!)

Distance Reiki Sessions ~ $5 (A Crazy Low Price for all of my friends who tell me all of the time, 'I wish you were in my town, country or village') J

All you have to do is make a payment via Pay Pal referencing my personal email account: ladysusan@sbcglobal.net

Then I will contact you via email to schedule your session and/or to confirm who is receiving the gift certificate and where to mail it… Yes, this is a great gift to give to your loved ones and friends…Energy based work promotes relaxation and reduces stress allowing the body’s innate intelligence to express itself and heal from the inside out. Doesn't that sound better than the re-gifted item that no one wants?

Who do you know that could benefit from an hour of “ME-time”? Or has a child that could benefit from the energy balancing?

Happy Holidays to you and yours!! May you each find simplicity in this season!!

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An Autism Christmas Poem: A Walk In Our Shoes

"Twas the Night Before Christmas
And all through the house
The creatures were stirring
Yes, even the mouse

We tried melatonin
And gave a hot bath
Asleep early for Christmas?
...an unlikely path

The children were finally
All nestled in bed
When visions of Christmas
Ran through my OWN head

Did I get the right gift?
The right color and style?
Would there be a blank stare
Or even, maybe, a smile?

Friends & family come
But they don't understand
The pleasure she gets
Just from bending her hands.

"Just make her stop it," some say
"Just tell her "no",
“You must learn to be tough.."
On and on they go...

We smile and nod
Because we know deep inside
The debate is moot
Let them all take a side

We know what it's like
To live with the spectrum
The struggles, triumphs
achievements and regressions.

But what some don't know
And what some don't see
Is the joy that we feel
Over simplicity.

She said "hello"!
She ate something green!
She looked me in my eyes
She did not cause a scene!

She peed on the potty!
Who cares if she's ten;
She stopped saying the same thing
Again and again!"

Some others don't realize
Just how we can cope
How we bravely hang on
At the end of our rope

But what they don't see
Is the joy we can't hide
When our children with autism
Make the tiniest stride

We may look at others
Without the problems we face
With envy, with wonder,
Or even distaste,

What we want them to know
What's important to see
Is that children with autism
Bring simplicity.

We don't get excited
Over expensive things
We jump for joy
With the progress work brings

Children with autism
Try so hard every day
That they make us proud
More than words can say.

They work even harder
Than you or I
To achieve something small
To reach a star in the sky

So to those who don't get it
Or can't get a clue
Take a walk in our shoes
And I'll assure you…

That even 10 minutes
Into the walk
You'll look at us all
With respect, even shock.

You will realize
What it is we go through
And the next time you see us
I can assure you

That you won't say a thing
You'll be quiet and learn,
Like the years I learned to
When the tables were turned.

~Christine Muczyk

(A Mom from the support group I lead sent this to me... powerful!!)

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My Soap Box: Don't Pretend to Care via Your Product or Service

The more I think about the HollyRod Holiday ipad giveaway the more annoyed I become... why are they putting such income limits on it ($35,000 for a single income and $50,000 for a two income family ~ that is not a lot of money in the world of special needs) and why does my SLP have to be in control of the giftcard ... so we don't qualify... that doesn't mean we can budget this tool that could make a HUGE SUBSTANTIAL difference in my child's life. Apparently, they don't understand the financial crisis in Autism Families.

Why is everything they say is essential so expensive... Biomedical case in point. It would cost me more than $500 to just get the appointment on the books for our local Bio-med doctor... for an appointment that is 12-18 months scheduled out... Yet, alone insurance won't touch the office visit, supplements, and other non-traditional therapies (the oxygen therapy intrigues me).

...Every one should be able to afford to get the care they deem necessary for their kids.

This is precisely why I offer substantial discounts to autism families with energy work... autism families cannot afford $60-$120 an hour for energy work... they can barely afford to feed their kids and pay for the co-pays for the traditional therapies... and unless you have been touched by autism there is no way you can understand this. I watch and listen... (I might burn bridges here) and I have seen countless energy workers trying to exploit this population... perhaps some are heart centered, but not all... I recently had one (a former mentor of mine) try to tell me the other day ... "she isn't autistic. She is on a spectrum, you should make an appointment with me to learn more. I could teach you a lot about 'THEM'!"

...Are you serious???

You went to one weekend course and you think you know more about the autism spectrum than I... who has lived it for the last 6 years? Do you not see the dark circles under my eyes... those are my battle wounds... I wear them with pride. I have countless hours of research at the university of google... and have witnessed countless pokes and prods on a little girl who couldn't comprehend why her mother was letting these strangers violate her space. I have hours logged in at the local lobby where I sit with other mothers (and fathers) and listen to their strategies. I spend every other minute of free time I have either in the library reading or on the world wide web talking to adults on the spectrum or other parents... I live, eat, sleep, breath Autism 24/7 !

Don't offend me!!

Nothing pushes my buttons more than seeing organizations, practitioners, doctors, pharmaceutics, authors, specialty merchandisers... (this list goes on and on!!!) ... that are trying to capitalize off of the challenges our children and adults on the spectrum have. And with the Holidays around the corner we will see more and more of this.

Okay, so maybe that was a soap box... sorry.

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IQ tests are done... now what? (Homeschool, Resource Room, something more creative??)

A portion of the verdict is in…

The psychologist called late last night (as requested) and said the IQ portions are done.

Our daughter is testing at an early 3^rd grade level, “…and that is being generous. It’s more second grade.” Although I am not surprised, as that was my assessment when we started homeschooling in the fall, I am feeling over whelmed.

(Note: She is 11 years old; in the 5^th grade ~ we started kindergarten at 6 years because we didn’t feel she was ready, so she was already technically a year behind her peers!)

My main question to veteran homeschoolers is this: Do you re-adjust the curriculum to meet the child where she is? I mean, after all, how can she do the 5^th grade stuff if she doesn’t have the 3^rd and 4^th grade skills? I know that seems like an obvious question, but...

if that is what we decide to do… what about those end of the year assessments?

If I am doing 3^rd grade curriculum with my 5^th grader, the 5^th grade assessment is ridiculous to even administer, right? And if she gets the ‘below proficiency ‘ (which by the way is what she got last year while IN PUBLIC school!!) on the 5^th grade exams, will the district and State of Ohio see that as me not doing my job with this kid homeschooling?

The psychologist explained the only way to put her back into the school system is if they got her an IEP for a severe Learning Delay (haven’t got all the formal diagnosis yet). And with this IEP they put her in a ‘Resource Room’.

Okay, so this is my next issue….

I have ‘issues’ (okay I have big issues) with the resource rooms… even for her sibling who has infantile autism!! It is seclusive, has a stigma, and I want her around peer models (which I know she isn’t getting at home either)!! This child’s emotional well-being is fragile, and this would destroy her!! (No, I am not over reacting, in case that popped into your head!!) This is a child who has been mainstreamed for her entire academic career up until now and…

So I know I already answered THAT question… no resource room for her!

That puts us back at homeschooling… AAARRRGGGHHH!! Apparently, I take this more seriously than then the “professionals” who said at the end of the school year that she was within the ‘norm’ (whatever that means!!) and denied any testing. Not only did they deny the MFE, they said even if they saw challenges in let's say math... they don't offer math intervention. Yes, I know they are totally out of line. I have been raising cain since the 2^nd grade and this particular school district has done nothing! I am rightfully upset!! But, my main concern is my daughter right now.... I will deal with the district later.

As a mother what do you do? Your child’s school days and progress mold their future… how do I help this child????

Okay, to be continued after we get the diagnosis in….

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2 Year Anniversary: Reflections on Autism

Today is the 2 year anniversary of Sahara’s formal diagnosis of Infantile Autism.

I thought about writing about the huge accomplishments we have seen in the past 24 months… and let there be no mistake they have been huge!! We have left Catatonia in the dust!! Her speech, socialization, cognition, sensory, and every other facet of her being has exploded into this wonderful expression of life!! I am so proud of all of her hard work.

...Yes, we have come a long way, but we have an even farther way to go.

I thought about writing about the blessings I have found in the world of Autism… and let there be no mistake there are huge blessings. I have made friendships and have encountered opportunities that would have otherwise failed to exist. Read my list of blessings HERE.

...Yes, blessings are always there.

I thought about writing about the spiritual side of Autism… and let there be no mistake my daughter is more connected to God than I could ever dream of. However, I have learned to trust God more and that He trusts me even more than that.

...Yes, God is good.

I thought about writing about the fears I have endured over the past year… and let there be no mistake there are fears that I face on a daily basis; elopement, wandering, sexual predators, IEPs, civil rights, bullying, harassment…

...Yes, there are dark corners in my life.

I thought about writing about the struggles her sister has faced… and let there be no mistake that she had to face more in her short lifetime than your typical tween. She has had part of her childhood ripped away by this invisible monster called Autism that consistently puts her on the back burner.

...Yes, siblings have it rough.

I thought about writing about the strain in our marriage… and let there be no mistake there has been strain. The piles of doctor bills that insurance refuses to cover, the reduction to one income, and the never ending discussions about the never ending issues that circle our life.

...Yes, communication is key.

I thought about writing how the diagnosing psychologist was wrong is her prognosis… and let there be no mistake she was wrong! My daughter is talking, socializing and living a fulfilling life. She will go to college, have a career, a family and any other thing she so chooses to do.

...Yes, possibilities are limitless.

And as I thought about all of the things I could write, I realized that the most important thing to say today was that I would like to introduce you my daughter, Sahara Grace.

Sahara is six years old and just started kindergarten. She likes her teacher, follows directions well and declares that she loves school each time she gets off of the yellow bus. Sahara is funny, witty and even sarcastic. She loves animals, bats, watermelon, Curious George and Mr. Bean. She enjoys riding her bike, swimming and playing hide-and-go-seek. She has self determination, a sense of adventure and the patience of a saint.

Sahara’s best friend is her eleven year old sister, Emily. Not only do they share the common bond of sisterhood, they also share the passion for horses, dinosaurs, water activities, chocolate, the outdoors and just about everything else they venture to do; in fact, they are almost inseparable. Daily my daughters inspire me to be a better mother and person!

You can read more about our early journey (HERE) on the Autism Women’s Network.

I would like to conclude by saying that if you are a parent of a child that you think may be on the autism spectrum… you are not alone! Demand that someone listen to you about your concerns so that your child can start getting the services and care she/he needs. Then find a support group so you can get the care you need.

I have found that joining Twitter and Face Book to be one of the best things I could have done for ME. It was through a sense of community and knowledge that I was able to empower myself to stand up to the plate and become my daughter’s best advocate.

Read about the Signs and Symptoms of Autism HERE

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