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Monday, 31 August 2009

Mother Rebel

Posted on 15:56 by tripal h

I didn’t wake up one morning a mother rebel and decide to piss off all of my family and friends. In fact, I didn’t reveal my mothering style to anyone for many years (as it was a personal decision between my husband and me). It wasn’t until after I recorded my research and experiences in The Mother Consciousness that I started to openly talk about our lifestyle.

I entered my stance on holistic mothering with caution; researching as much literature that I could get my hands on. I have spent countless hours filtering through research articles, documents, online resources and books. I have read many different perspectives pertaining to different mothering and health practices. I have weighed out the facts, sifted through consequences, and rendered personal decisions.

I, also, put the energy forth to not take the inventory of other mothers whom views may differ from my own. However, I have made it my business to inform others about my findings… why?

Because… until I entered a conversation with a health care professional about vaccines, I didn’t know I had a right to question the constructs man had instituted upon mothers. I was naive to the mere fact that I had a right to make an educated mindful choice about the physical, emotional and spiritual well being of my off spring. After some self-discovery, I determined that I had the inherent right to raise my kids as I deemed in their best interest… even if that meant going against the grain. Empowered with knowledge and maternal instinct, I knew that some stranger in a white lab coat or Armani suit did not have the power to dictate how we were going to raise our children.

Man is fallible; if you want to know how I reached that conclusion read my book. In The Mother Consciousness I talk about the series of events that awakened the natural mother within me including the death of my father, the brutality of a cervical biopsy, being misinformed about the future of my ability to bear children, the sexual abuse in America, and more.

I do have a pet peeve with some of the mothers that have not made the decisions I have… not because they choose a different lifestyle, that is their right too. In all honesty, I usually keep my mouth shut about their practices in order to avoid the agonizing confrontation and I believe that you have the right to raise your kids how you see fit. However, after many discussions with other mothers who have similar perspectives and after talking with those who don’t, I conclude that many women in the holistic movement feel forced to defend their mothering philosophies.

I no longer have the energy to defend myself… until you have a child that is suspected to have a vaccine injury and until you have tried to participate in attachment / holistic mothering you cannot rationally condemn my perspectives. Frankly, if my mothering practices offend you, make you feel less than, or stimulate something uneasy in you, that is your issue not mine. Simply don’t read what I post here on my Alterna-mom blog, Twitter or Facebook. And certainly, don’t buy my book, The Mother Consciousness. I do not force this life style (which takes much energy and focus) on anyone. But, as a wellness educator, I will inform you so that you too can make an educated decision. And if that decision is different than the one I’d make, that is okay, because you made it mindfully.

I decided not vaccinate my children before autism was intimately in our lives.

I do associate the 3 injections of a vaccine they mandated I take because of my Rh negative blood to my daughter’s autism.

I understand that to vaccinate is a choice, not something that doctors or government should mandate or force you to do.

I believe it is illogical to put thimersol into a pregnant or lactating woman.

I acknowledge that natural immunity is far superior to the toxins forced into your infant and child’s body.

I question the effects of the mother’s vaccination history on her offspring.

I do think the breast is best.

I advocate that women nurse their children beyond infancy; the world average is 4 years.

I think it is normal for women to tandem nurse siblings that have resulted from single births.

I know the home is the best place to birth during an uncomplicated labor and delivery.

I correlate medication and institutionalized birthing to the pestilence of sickness among our children.

If I had had a son I would have left him whole and intact the way our creator intended him to be.

I think co-sleeping with your child fosters trust and security.

I know that the power that created the body has the power to heal the body.

I trust that a fever is an expression of health.

I understand that when a mother works away from the children they are exposed to possible abuse and neglect.

I know the mother is the best caregiver for her children.

If you are in alignment of my views, I am glad we have connected and look forward to expanding our Mother Consciousness together. If you are intrigued I am glad you have an open mind and invite you to learn more. If you cannot relate to any of this simply hit the x button, turn away and move on… don’t try to convince me my views are wrong and in return, I will not disrespect your views; let’s simply agree to disagree.

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Posted in autism, breastfeeding, co-sleeping, emotional health, mercury and gestation, Natural Birth, Pregnancy, proactive health, RhoGam, The Mother Consciousness, Toxins, twitter, Vaccination | No comments

Thursday, 27 August 2009

Quinoa Stuffed Peppers: GFCF Recipe of the Week

Posted on 13:53 by tripal h

This is a very flavorful twist on traditional stuffed pepppers. Serve with a garden salad for a satisfying meal.


½ cup Quinoa, uncooked

1 Cup Water

1 teaspoon Better Than Bouillon Bouillon- Organic Vegatable

1# Ground Beef

1Tablespoon Minced Garlic

½ teaspoon Kosher Salt

½ teaspoon Cracked Pepper

1 Can Diced Tomatoes

3 Tablespoons Fresh Salsa

3 Green Peppers

Place quinoa, water and bouillon in a pot; bring to a boil, stir, cover and remove from heat. Let it set for 5 minutes then place in a bowl to cool.

Clean and de-seed the green peppers. Cut ½ inch off their bottoms, then cut them in half and place in a deep baking dish.

Place diced tomatoes and salsa in a blender and puree.

In a large mixing bowl combine cooled quinoa, hamburger, garlic, salt, pepper, and ½ of puree. Put equal portions in each of the 6 pepper halves. Pour ½ inch water in the dish with peppers and cover with foil.

Bake in 350 preheated oven for ½ an hour. Remove foil and pour remaining puree over peppers. Baste every 10 minutes for an additional hour. Remove from oven and let rest for 5 minutes before serving.

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Posted in GFCF recipe | No comments

Wednesday, 26 August 2009

Personal Hygiene... At What Cost?

Posted on 10:09 by tripal h

Since yesterday’s post was about shaving legs and arm pits, I thought it would be appropriate to blog today about Deodorant… Good personal hygiene is an important habit to teach our children, but at what cost?

At some point along our wellness journey, we began to question ingredients in the products we put on our body… and reconsidered how we approached our personal hygiene. For instance, did you know that it only takes a few seconds for anything that touches your skin to be absorbed into the blood stream; aluminum, propylene glycol, parabens...

There has been medical research conducted about breast cancer and aluminum in deodorants. Several sources stated that there was a study conducted that concluded that 18 out of 20 breast cancer tissue samples had parabens in them. With that said, I cannot fathom why more people do not question the common use of these ingredients.

Young girls seem especially vulnerable to me… with their overexposure to hormone laced foods and the seduction of marketers to use these girl products laced with questionable ingredients.

I know, I know… You are thinking, “Oh my God, this tree hugging hippy has stinky arm pits and it going to tell me to embrace my natural self!” Let me reassure you, that is not the case. My point simply is, read the labels and make an educated decision about what you put in and on your body. Be proactive even about what you are putting under your arm pits close to your mammary glands.

We have tried many natural deodorant products, none of which really met our personal hygiene needs. That is until we tried mineral salts and pure water. It is 100% natural and eliminates the bacteria that cause that unseemly odor.

Yep, it really is as simple as that; mineral salts!

No, I am not selling a product nor do I get kickbacks for endorsing this… right now, it is the obvious solution to this issue... Not only does it eliminate odor and avoid questionable ingredients, but it is more economic as well.

*Try Thai Crystal Deodorant or make your own solution.


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Posted in Children's health, Home Remedies, hormones, Money Saving Tip, parabens, tweens | No comments

Tuesday, 25 August 2009

Inquiring Moms Question: Is 10 Years Old Too Young To Start Shaving?

Posted on 11:57 by tripal h

My daughter is beginning to bloom out of her Tomboyish persona into a developing Tween. When we went school shopping this year she demonstrated how true this was... she was bopping to the music in the teen stores and modeling feminine outfits with confidence. This is a new side to her that I think is quite frankly freaking her father out, but I am excited to see her bloom into her own essence. So, during our girls outing, we carefully selected a few short sleeve shirts and cute, yet comfortable skirts for school…

Here lies the question: She has obvious hair under her armpits and on her legs. She is only 10! At what age do you teach your daughter how to shave?

I put the question out there to other moms and this is what they had to say:

10% - Said it depended on the coloration of the hair. If the hair was dark… yes, teach her to shave now. If the hair was light, you just bought her (and you) some time.

10% - Said take the daughter’s lead. If she is talking about it, it is probably time to pull out that pink razor. If she isn’t aware of it, don’t make a big fuss about it.

20% - Said that it depends on the emotional maturation of the individual tween; explain to her the consequences of her actions. The novelty will wear off within a few weeks and then you will have no choice versus risking the brutal taunting of your peers. Way out the consequences together then let her decide.

60% - Absolutely do it now, before the teasing begins or before she hacks herself. Remember those cuts you got when your mom didn’t let you shave when you really really wanted to?

Although, the majority thought it was urgent that we embark on the task of shaving, I went with the 20% margin… We sat down and had a heart to heart discussion about the natural consequences of both options. After we talked about it, she looked me square in the eye and said, “I will wait!”

I met her decision with respect…. But, explained that if she were to change her mind at ANY TIME that she should let me know so I could teach her the proper way to shave… (I still cringe at the thought of the gashes I had way back when).

In the mean time, I am going to head over to the local library and look up a few books a twitter-mom recommended on early puberty and developing.

Early Puberty in Girls

Care and Keeping of You

Here's Lily

The Body Book

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Posted in Children's health, confidence, decision making, emotional health, Inquiring Mom Questions, puberty, self empowerment, tweens | No comments

Saturday, 22 August 2009

Letter From the Tooth Fairy

Posted on 19:59 by tripal h




Around the world I flew tonight.

My path lit by lightening bugs so bright.


Who to greet, who to meet?

A sleeping girl, O’ so sweet.


Seven fairies protect your room

Under the glistening silver moon.


I quietly slid beneath your head

A dollar for you I upon your bed.


I found no tooth and that’s okay

A big girl tooth is still on the way.


Love,

The Tooth Fairy

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Posted in Meditation, Tooth Fairy | No comments

Friday, 21 August 2009

F@#k You, Mommy.... a.k.a. I Love You!

Posted on 19:30 by tripal h

I LOVE YOU... Three simple, yet complex words!

They may just be the most powerful words in existence; yet, so many take them for granted. How often do you utter them in auto-pilot? Or colloquial speech… Love Ya?

The first time Emily said “I love you” she used the wrong words; it wasn’t what she said as much as it was the tone, the face expression, and the endearment behind them that allowed me to experience what she meant as she uttered, “Fuck You, Mommy.”

SCREEEEECH…. WHAT?!?!?

Yep, she looked me straight in the eyes and with all of the tenderness she could summon, in her sweet little voice, she uttered, “Fuck You, Mommy.” I am not sure where she learned that, but she used it in the most innocent loving expression and in an instant I knew she meant I Love You.

After I explained those were not nice words, I gave her the appropriate words to use. Somehow over time we took for granted that she had words to express. That is until Sahara came along and never found hers.

Yes, she can tell me she loves me through expressions and actions… but a mother longs for those three sweet words.

This all was the furthest thing from my mind today at the barn, but as we were leaving the stable, Sahara gestured for me to pick her up. I lifted her up into my arms and out of the blue those sweet sweet words filled my essence, “I OV YOU, MOMMY!”

Again, the words weren’t perfect, but none of that mattered for the second time in my life as she said, “I LOVE YOU, MOMMY!” with tender sincerity.

I, often, hear others insinuate that people with autism are incapable of expressing emotion or engaging in meaningful relationships. I am here to tell you otherwise; I LOVE YOU, MOMMY… spontaneous, un-solicited, functional, compassionate sweet sweet words.

Another milestone achieved!!

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Posted in autism, language, self empowerment, Siblings, speech therapy, The Mother Consciousness | No comments

Thursday, 20 August 2009

Ignorance About Her 'World'

Posted on 09:46 by tripal h

"Aren't they lucky? They get to live in their own little world. They don’t have to be bothered with what is around them like we do… It must be nice!"

WHAT!?!?!

Yep, that is the response I got during some small talk from the cashier at Star Bucks this morning, after learning I had a daughter diagnosed with autism.

I am sure she wasn’t a complete idiot, because she quickly registered the face expression I had and I am sure I was glaring at her with all the bottled up contempt I have felt for the past five years. She abruptly started talking about her autistic nephew and how he eats toilet paper and how you cannot talk loudly around him… somehow sharing her story was supposed to make the sting of her comment go away.

Was she just trying to relate? I don’t know, frankly, I don’t care. Here is my take…

Firstly, I am not going to sugar coat this… This will have graphic language! I often pride myself on being heart-centered and helping others focus on the positives on this difficult journey… sometimes I think that a small glimpse of hope is what parents on the spectrum need to hear and I made that my mission… to inspire, educate and offer hope to mothers, fathers and siblings… but today I am setting that aside to let others (on the other side of this spectrum) know the nightmare we live!!!

Like it or not this is the attitude of many people in our communities. They see our Children and they have the outer appearance of neurotypical children, so there is this misconception that these kids are well. In fact, I think that many people that are directly affected by autism have this attitude as well. (Grandparents, aunts uncles, friends, ministers, therapists, teachers, neighbors…)

Another woman once invited me to participate in a fundraiser for a local camp for kids with ‘serious illnesses’. So, I asked if they had services for kids with autism and her response knocked me off of my seat; this camp apparently was designed for kids who “suffering with serious illness”.

You know serious illnesses like asthma, arthritis, cancer, heart disease…. NOT AUTISM.

It isn’t like you’re dealing with cancer or a debilitating disease, right? Well, sometimes I think THAT would be easier… your fate is presented and there is a clear cut plan of what to do. In many of our cases, we have to go through life guessing what is going to work best of our child, because no one has a fucking clue what to do with them.

No one is doing unbiased third party research… because no money is to be made.

No one is advocating for action against the discrimination they receive from insurance companies… because it will cost too much to treat.

No one is planning for their future… because they don’t acknowledge that this is a disability and it will affect them long after the parents are gone.

The day to day challenges are dismissed as behavior problems… no one sees that it IS a serious illness; you know a medical condition….

Yes, Autism is a medical condition that prevents my child from wanting to wear clothing… no amount of coaxing is going to solve that over night!

It is a medical condition that prevents my child from having functional speech… can your child tell you if someone sexually assaulted her… mine can’t.

It is a medical condition that causes her to not have interest in what the kids outside are doing… she is not in her own world Miss Cashier she is isolated in a medical condition that won’t release its grip.

It is a medical condition that gives my child the never ending need to complete an entire cartoon episode or movie scene before she can lie down at night and sleep for a few hours before waking up because, well, I don’t know why she wakes up…. She can’t tell me!

It is a medical condition that keeps me up at night worrying about her future… will she go to kindergarten, college, get married, or have kids??

It is a medical condition that makes me call people and say don’t name my child in your will… that would really fuck up her services and treatment plan!

It is a medical condition that prevents her from sitting down with us to eat dinner… missing out on our conversations, laughter, and bonding.

It is a medical condition that makes her crave the same foods presented the same way every day… and, yes, even string, toilet paper, and dirt.

It is a medical condition that prevents me from getting a job… I have to take her to Occupational therapy, Music therapy, Speech therapy, Physical therapy… to the neurologist, geneticist, psychologist… the appointments never end.

It is a medical condition that creates fear about what will happen to her if I die… so; I have just accepted that I cannot die… I must out live my daughter so I don’t have to worry about what will happen to her, because it kills me inside to think about her future. No one in my eyes is qualified to take over.

It is a medical condition that mandates my other daughter to be put on the back burner too often…will the create anger, resentment, or rage?

It is a fucking medical condition!

No, my daughter isn’t lucky to be in her own world. I know she looks like a normal 5 year old in the cart as I push her through the rare trip to the store, but I work daily and, often, through the night at figuring out how to pull her into our world.

I want to know what she thinks, loves, knows, remembers, cherishes…

I want her to be a part of my world, her sister’s world, her father’s world, THIS WORLD!!

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Posted in autism, Children's health, national health crisis, occupational therapy, speech therapy | No comments

Wednesday, 19 August 2009

GFCF Sloppy Joes: Recipe of the Week

Posted on 07:21 by tripal h

Last night we were rushing dinner so we could get to our (free) movie on time!! My daughter saw me pull the hamburger out of the freezer and declared, “We’re having Sloppy Joes tonight?!?!”

…I have to admit that was not the plan. If you know me, then you know there was no way I had canned Sloppy Joe sauce laced with high fructose corn syrup in it in the pantry!! What to do?

Well, I did it again; I swear this tasted just like the canned stuff, if not better!!

1 ½ Pounds Ground Hamburger

1 Medium Yellow Onion, diced

¼ Green Pepper, diced

¼ Red Pepper, diced

1 Cup Organic Ketchup

1 teaspoon Homemade Taco Mix

¼ Cup Clean Water

In a large skillet brown meat over medium heat; add onion and peppers.

Whisk together ketchup, taco mix, and water; add to meat.

Simmer for a few minutes. Serve on homemade GF buns or with corn chips.

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Posted in GFCF recipe, High Fructose Corn Syrup | No comments

Money Saving Tip #6: Go To The Movies For Free

Posted on 06:44 by tripal h

I know I haven’t posted any new money saving tips in awhile, but this one is just too good to keep to myself!

Yesterday.. I popped onto twitter to read some of the inspirational quotes before the dinner time crunch. I noticed ColumbusMovies posted a free ticket code for a complimentary prescreening for the new movie SHORTS.

AMAZING, RIGHT!?!?

Here’s the Bottom Line… there was no catch!

This is what we did:


1. Follow ColumbusMovies on Twitter.

2. When you see a post for a complimentary screening, enter the promo code in the link on the twitter post.

3. Print how many tickets you need. (Up to four)

4. Arrive early to the theater (the press and first come are served first).

5. Enter stadium 30 minutes prior to show.

6. Relax and enjoy the show!!


If you don't live in the Columbus vicinity... try finding a similar link in your area!

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Posted in Coupons, Money Saving Tip, movies, twitter | No comments

Tuesday, 18 August 2009

Ice Skating, Girl Power, and Unconditional Love

Posted on 09:58 by tripal h

I have to say my favorite summer tradition is our annual ice skating outing. Yes, ice skating in August! Can you think of a more creative way to beat the dog days of summer? Neither can I.

The girls and I dug out our winter hats and mittens, put on our jeans and headed over to the Chiller Skating Rink. Being August, it wasn’t very busy today… maybe 20 skaters, at best, including 3 pro hockey guys in their getup.

Sahara was glued to the wall, which was fine with me… she stopped at each bench and penalty box while her sister periodically came up from behind to say, “Hi” and offer a helping hand. It took Sahara 45 minutes to do one lap then she hesitantly stepped off of the rink. She amazed me as she walked on her skates without wobbling, which according to her IEP she shouldn’t be able to do.

(LEAPS AND BOUNDS!)

After she removed her skates we went to the balcony to watch Emily skate with confidence, pink cheeks, and a faint smile of pride. Emily twirled and sped across the ice with grace, not a common trait in this kid.

(Another moment of ACCOMPLSHEMENT filled me.)

As we headed to the car, Emily declared she was hungry. After lunch we headed over to the department store to get a jump start on school shopping. As we pulled up to the stop light, I had this urge I just had to heed to. I rolled down my window and freely yelled, “GIRLS ROCK!” Emily’s eyes got big and I heard a faint giggle…

“1, 2, 3… GIRL POWER!”

…we were laughing, shouting, and enjoying our girlhood to the fullest. Sahara participated from the backseat laughing as much as her sister did as she repeated “Girl Power”. For that moment we had no diagnosis in the car, no constraints from society, and no peer pressure… we were just innocently enjoying a mom and me outing celebrating our girl-ness.

We talked about how girls can do anything a boy can do (psst, sometimes better). This is something I think young girls often are not encouraged to do, but not today… today I told them they could be, do, and experience ANYTHING they decided to.

We talked about it being awesome that Emily loves science and math, and that girls can have those types of careers too. I even discovered that Emily secretly thought it would be really neat if her and her sister grew up to be Paleontologists working together on excavations.

HOW COOL IS THAT!?!?

Most siblings want to get as far away from each other as possible, but not my girls. I suppose that this is Emily’s way of saying that I shouldn’t worry about Sahara’s future. She often declares that Sahara and she will live together when they leave home, and sometimes I think that just might be the case.

This was evident half way through the store when Emily (out of the blue) declared, “I LOVE MY SISTER!!!” I looked over at her and smiled faintly, “I know you do and she loves you…”

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Posted in autism, Children's health, confidence, emotional health, Exercise, park, self empowerment, shoes, Siblings, tweens | No comments

Wednesday, 12 August 2009

The ABC's of Innis Woods Metro Park (by Emily and Mommy)

Posted on 13:47 by tripal h
Today we went to Innis Woods Metro Park in Westerville, Ohio... if you live in the Central Ohio region, you have a bounty of free parks awaiting your exploration... turn off the tv and take the kids outside. Our children learn through interacting with their environment. If you live elsewhere, you need to research what is in your backyard... you may be surprised at what you discover. Parks give families an excellant opportunity to bond and great lasting memories while learning more about nature. Here is a list of things that the girls and I saw or experienced today...

Amazing Adventure

Bridges

Chipmunks

Deer

Ebbing water

Families

Grey squirrel

Hills

Investigation

Joggers

Kalology (study of beauty)

Labyrinth

Meadow

Nature

Oobambulate (to wander about)

Pine Trees

Quality time

Red Cardinal

Spider

Toads

Uliginoud (a swampy, slimy place)

Violets

Windmill

Xenial (hospitality towards guests… from ranger.)

Yellow Daisies

Zeta (a small room with nature displays)

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Posted in adventures, Children's health, confidence, earth, emotional health, Energy, Exercise, park, physical health, self empowerment, sensory processing | No comments

Tuesday, 11 August 2009

Careful of Body Image... She is Watching

Posted on 05:42 by tripal h

When I met my husband I was 18 years old, 5 foot 9 inches, and 95 pounds (if soaking wet). I never wanted to be as thin as I was… my metabolism just was that of a gerbil’s! In fact, I remember many times attempting to gain weight during high school and I just couldn’t. Many people thought I had an eating disorder, but I didn’t—it really was just the way my body and metabolism worked.

I gained a lot of weight when I was 26 years old after my father passed away; I soothed my grief with food: mashed potatoes, ice cream, chocolate. It wasn’t until years later that I learned Chocolate really did affect the brain. Serotonin, a neurotransmitter commonly known as an antidepressant is triggered by tryptophan which is found in chocolate.

Over the years I have either been either too skinny or too heavy by my own standards. Although, it never amounted into a true eating disorder by definition, it certainly misconstrued how I perceived my body. Now, I admit I am 170 and agonize over the loss of the body I once had.

Today we eat healthy (mostly organic) real foods and trust me I am active… I chase (literally) after kids, do laundry, clean house, go on outdoor excursions, taxi Sahara to and from various therapies & Emily to her extracurricular activities, I climb stairs all day, and never really get a few moments to sit down until the end of the day. At that point, I fall asleep out of pure exhaustion while putting the girls to bed, only to awaken in a few hours because I am worried about the one child who sleep walks and has night terrors and the other who wanders outdoors and is non-verbal.

I am sure that my lack of sleep over the years has contributed to those numbers staring back at me on the scale. I am also sure that I have learned to eat to comfort myself from the pain and worry over having a child diagnosed with autism, the loss of my professional identity, the stress of going from two incomes to one while I stay home with the girls, etc.

I am only 25 pounds away from my ideal weight, but the thing that bothers me the most about all of this isn’t those numbers or my body image... it is the message I have been sending to my approaching tween. I have heard her ask, “am I fat?” and “do I need to lose weight?” Although I will not take complete responsibility for this, I do take some.

I know she quietly sees me looking in the mirror with displeasure and hears me complaining about my outer appearance. She is a product of her mother! But, I also know that the children of today are more consumed with body image than we ever were. They are inundated with magazines and technology showing women that demonstrate perfection…. Let’s face it Sex and Image sells. Britney Spears is a perfect example of a generation x persona that gives a false image to the teens. In more recent times, Miley Cyrus (Hanna Montana) sells ‘sexy’ underwear, makeup, flashy purses and clothing… persuading the tweens and teens to have a certain image.

These young famous girls on the center stage have perfect shapes and complexions… makeup artists, lighting, and computer touch ups make these kids look immaculate. I suppose Barbie is just as bad. When my oldest was little I refused to buy any Barbie dolls for this exact reason. However, when Sahara received a Barbie doll from a kid for her birthday last year… it was over. Let’s face it this plastic personified doll has a perfect body, perfect hair, perfect friends, and a perfect boyfriend, Ken. We are hardwiring our little girls that they need to create this perfect image for themselves.

By the time these young girls are faced with their own emerging bodies, the peers come along… they are influential—regardless of how much we try to stay the primary influence, peers get a hold of our little angels and it is over. (I have found the ones with teenage sisters are the worse.) But, yes, even at 10 years of age, they are commenting about body image and outer body appearance. What is a mother to do?!?!

Firstly, take your own inventory… that is what I had to do. Somewhere along the avenue of mothering my approaching tween, I realized my body perception was influencing hers. I, now, create opportunities for her to see an average woman who is okay with her image. I want her to develop the awareness that it is okay to love yourself as you are and that your self-worth is not contingent on having a certain body image.

Role models start at the top and although we do not remain the primary influence of our young daughters… they are still watching. And if you can be confident in your skin regardless of the brand of clothes you wear, the loss of an 18 year old body, the healthier message they receive about how to perceive themselves.

I am presently 9 months away from my 40th birthday and am making a commitment to get to my ideal weight by that time. Not because I have a distorted body image that needs to be addressed, but more importantly because I want to be healthier and be a better role model for my young daughters. With heart disease and diabetes running rampid on both sides of their family tree, I want them to understand that the more they respect and take care of their body-temple the longer they will have it.


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Posted in Children's health, confidence, emotional health, Exercise, Food Sensitivity, Home Remedies, national health crisis, proactive health, self empowerment, tweens | No comments

Monday, 10 August 2009

GFCF Cabbage and Noodles: Recipe of the Week

Posted on 14:12 by tripal h
Yes, we are still eating the cabbage from Grandma's garden!

Here is another gluten free twist on a common Hungarian dish... the apples gave it a subtle sweetness. This is great for a vegetarian main course or an easy to make side dish that goes great with grilled pork or chicken. Enjoy!!


12 ounces Rice Penne Pasta

2 cups White Cabbage, thinly sliced

½ cup Red Cabbage, thinly sliced

1 White Onion, halved and thinly sliced

1 Macintosh Apple, sliced thinly in ½ inch pieces

2 TB Earth Balance Buttery Spread- Original

1 teaspoon Kosher Salt

¼ teaspoon Cracked Black Pepper

½ teaspoon Garlic Powder


Cook the rice penne pasta according to the package, drain and set aside.

In a large skillet melt cf butter; add onion and white cabbage. Stir frequently until caramelized.

Add red cabbage, apple, salt, pepper, and garlic to skillet; cook until tender. Mix in with pasta the vegetables and cook on low heat for 5 minutes.

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Posted in GFCF recipe | No comments

Sunday, 9 August 2009

Puppy Love

Posted on 06:55 by tripal h

So, yesterday’s prize fish from the fair are not doing well… so we ventured off to the pet store to get food, a sucker fish for the tank, and a few back up swimmers in case the goldfish don’t make it.

I don’t apologize that going to the pet store is one of my least favorite activities to do. My girls love it, I absolutely hate it! It’s not that I don’t like animals, but the whole experience is just heartbreaking for me.

Of course, they have the puppies greet you! You can’t avoid them… I tried, but there is just no way around them. They look at you with these big brown eyes pleading for you to become their new best friend. Once you pick them up it is over; the puppy breathe, soft fur, puppy kisses—all a part of the master plan to make them irresistible! It literally tears me up to have to walk away from them.

Although, I tried my best not to show it, a mellow yellow lab melted my heart today. I walked towards the aquatic section reminding myself that they grow up to be dogs, they are a lot of work and, frankly, I really don’t have the time or the energy to give a puppy what it needs. So… I was content to pick out a few fish.

I had the store clerk help me select the best algae eater to accompany the goldfish, then I called Emily over to pick out a couple of fish. As she rounded the corner, I noticed that she had that damn yellow lab in her arms. This dog was so cute, and I have seen a lot of puppies in my day, but this one really was mellow (my kind of dog)!

I convinced myself she was mellow because so many kids had surely played with her and she was just exhausted from all of the handling of the day. The guy helping me just had to say, “Yeah, she really is a mellow lab!” (Of course he is going to tell me that, he wants to make a sale.)

Okay, Susan focus on our mission here, “Pick out two fish; one for you and one for your sister.”

(Whew, that was close!)

I paid for the fish and supplies and headed towards the door. Emily stopped to say goodbye to Mellow-Yellow. (Yes, I named her. But, if I were to take her home that would have been the most befitting name.) As Emily said farewell, the puppy looked at her and I swear she knew what was about to happen; another family walking away from her. Mellow-Yellow whined as we opened the door, Emily looked at me with pleading eyes, and my heart sank.

Somehow, once we got home, I wasn’t so excited about the addition of fish to the acquarium. I felt crushing sadness to leave Yellow-Mellow behind today and wish my circumstances were different. But again, I have to say I really don’t have the time or energy for a dog.


Meet my newest family members…

Stan-Jan (short for Stanley Janitor) the algae eater, Smudge the black headed goldfish, and Dori the orange headed white goldfish. They are joining Peach and Bob from the fair. Maybe someday in the future we can get a new puppy… but until them I am the proud mama of fish.

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Posted in animal, decision making, emotional health | No comments

Saturday, 8 August 2009

The Ohio State Fair...A Family Moment!

Posted on 15:25 by tripal h
Every August we venture off to The Ohio State Fair… but let’s face it, this is not the ideal outing for a child with sensory issues. The loud noises, mobs of people, toxic food, and carnies are enough to make a nuerotypical person get on edge… but throw autism, specialized diets, and language deficits into the mix and you may just have a recipe for disaster.

But, not this year… maybe we are better equipped with preparing her for such an outing with deep pressure stimulation, packed snacks, sharing social stories based on what to expect, and of course allowing the girls to feel in control of the day. Maybe… it was because there were less people in attendance on this day, no lines for rides, and a breeze to take the edge off of the summer heat. Or maybe…. she is getting well and better able to handle the stimulation. I suppose it was most likely a combination of all of these factors.

Regardless, this year’s visit to the fair was our best to date; laughter, companionship, and good ol’ fashion fun.

This year we were able to ride on more rides… partly because she is older, partly because she found them either soothing or exhilarating and mostly because she didn’t attempt to crawl out of the flimsy seatbelts. Of course, after the 4th time of climbing the 166 steps to get to the top of the ‘big yellow slide’, I realized nothing was going to stop this kid or her sister. That is probably when we realized that our girls were capable of accompanying each other on the rides… allowing mommy and daddy to stand off to the side basking in the joy of their children sharing a moment of sisterhood.

Let’s not forget about the animals… which they both indulged; especially at the birthing center. (Yes, the young twin lambs even won my heart.) At one moment Sahara was completely captured by Elsie the Borden’s Butter Cow. Every time she rubbed Elsie’s head, Elsie would moo loudly. The timing was impeccable and gave Sahara the conclusion that Elsie’s moo was caused by the effect of her rubbing her—another moment of cognitive clarity that made me smile.

Daddy took Emily over to the adult rides and she got to experience her first rollercoaster… I am certain this fed her need for excitement and her never ending need for sensory input as well. When they returned she had a smile larger than life. I am sure they had a father-daughter moment that she would retain in the recess of her childhood memories.

While they were off having this moment together, I had a moment of my own… on the carrousel mounted on my own horse (another milestone achieved) I looked over and saw a 5 year old enjoying an age appropriate activity and saw a glimpse of her normalcy. Reclaiming her childhood has been one focus of ours, and The Ohio State Fair allowed us to see our hard work pay off!

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Posted in adventures, autism, brushing, Children's health, emotional health, fathers, Food Sensitivity, Home Remedies, laughter, self empowerment, sensory issues, sensory processing, Siblings | No comments

Wednesday, 5 August 2009

Jenny McCarthy Offers Hope To Mothers!

Posted on 14:47 by tripal h

Have you noticed that people either love Jenny McCarthy or hate her? Frankly, I didn’t know who Jenny McCarthy was until a friend suggested I Google her after she saw my daughter spinning and avoiding social contact more than 3 years ago. (At that point in our life we were still in denial; how dare she suggest my perfect daughter have autism!!)

It was a few days later when I finally asked my husband if he had heard of her. Of course he had… but it was from her MTV days and the description of that Jenny McCarthy certainly didn’t describe the woman my friend suggested I look up. I put it behind me and we continued on with our life.

My friend kept passively implying that Sahara had many characteristics of autism. I was seriously annoyed that this person has obviously reading into the many traits that were “just Sahara” to us. This feeling was only confirmed when the pediatrician said, “some kids just don’t talk until they are six years old... they just have delayed speech. She seems fine to me. Come back in six months.”

I do admit I had a nagging feeling that something was wrong. (This feeling began when I was pregnant with her... I chalked it up as typical fear that an expectant mother experiences.) It wouldn’t be until she was 3 ½ that we finally yielded to this maternal feeling to have her tested at the Public City School’s Special Needs Preschool. At the IEP meeting, I hit a brick wall. How could I have not seen any of this? She had delays in everything… socially, physically, cognitively, fine motor, gross motor…! I think I cried for 2 days straight, then pulled MY big girl panties up and became proactive. I knew it could be easy to fall into a poor me attitude and lose more precious time or advocate for my child!

I have to admit that it would be another 9 months before her formal diagnosis. That was the second time I felt like I hit a break wall. However, this time instead of grieving I went to the library and got Jenny’s book, Louder than Words. I read it in less than a day…I kept reading passages out loud to my husband, who, honestly, seemed annoyed by my correlating our daughter to Jenny’s son. However, I shamefully admit that I felt relief that we didn’t experience the medical conditions Jenny described.

Louder than Words allowed hope to trickle in my essence for the first time since the beginning of our autism journey. If anything at all, Louder than Words gave me hope that I didn’t have to accept what the Psychologist reported to us, “most of these kids grow up not being able to live independently, don't have productive jobs, or participate in a intimate relationship including friendships.” Honestly, this statement is what fueled my fire. In the beginning I was out to prove her wrong, and then I found Jenny saying that this attitude was wrong…

...HOPE...

I am not saying I believe everything the DAN Doctors, Jenny McCarthy, or other biomedical supporters say, but I am saying that to stomp out any ounce of hope in a parent is wrong. I have had medical professionals tell me that if you followed biomedical treatments, like chelation, you are putting your child at risk for death. I have read statements from the medical community and from parents that debunk Jenny McCarthy based on her “play boy” history and inability to act. Really?!?! How can we base the validity of her claims based on her professional career?

I don’t care how bad of an actress she is in your opinion— there is no correlation between that and her ability to spread the word about vaccination safety and autism. The only button this pushes in me is that no one is talking about the vaccines containing thimerosal that are given to expectant mothers. I once had a nuerologist suggest our daughter's condition proved that there is no vaccination/autism connection because she isn't vaccinated.... what about the two shots of RhoGam I recieved during her pregnancy?!?!

Could that be why during her pregnancy I had this uneasy feeling something was wrong? Or why she would not make eye contact while nursing during infancy? Or why she slept for unusually long periods of times after birth? What about her 5 month old picture that she has Down's Syndrome features? That the geneticist and neurologist couldn't find a biological reason for the autism?

Another mom on Twitter once said that people like Jenny, who are focused on cures, are instilling false hope upon mothers who are more worried about staying status quo.... She implied that we need to except out plight and cope with it. I rebuke that! Hope is what a mother with a child with autism most certainly needs, hope is what Jenny McCarthy and the biomedical field offers. Hope is what allows us to sleep a few minutes each night.

Sadly, I may not be able to afford all of the modalities Jenny has provided for Evan, but I can give my child hope for a brighter tomorrow on the other side of the spectrum. It is not whether or not Jenny McCarthy is a good actress, a playboy or in a relationship with Jim Carrey— It is about a mother whose journey is touching the lives of a nation facing a pestilence among our youth. And if for a moment, you can be inspired that your child may lead a productive healthy life, then by God, let the woman inspire you and speak for the thousands of children who cannot.

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Posted in autism, emotional health, Jenny McCarthy, national health crisis, Pregnancy, self empowerment, The Mother Consciousness, Vaccination, Vaccine Injury Compensation Program | No comments

Tuesday, 4 August 2009

Grandma's Garden

Posted on 11:06 by tripal h
We packed the girls up Saturday morning for an impromptu visit to Grandma’s house; she hadn’t seen them in over a year, I wonder who was more excited. Daddy got out of bed way too early, the girls asked the whole way (2 ½ hours), "Are we there yet?" and Grandmother must have awakened at the crack of dawn—when we arrived the aroma of baking permeated the walkway.

If you walk away from my husband’s childhood house hungry it would be your own fault—Emily doesn’t call her the "Cooker Grandma" for no reason. For lunch Grandma prepared fried chicken, homemade mac-n-cheese, macaroni salad, mashed potatoes, gravy and zucchini bread. For desert she made us a fruit pudding with zucchini… I hesitated, but, once I tasted it I discovered it really was to die for. I suppose I aspire to be like my mother-in-law in the kitchen; basking in the nurturance of her children through her many kitchen creations.

After we finished this magnificent bounty, we went out to Grandma’s garden. Don’t let the concept of a grandmother gardening fool you. We harvested lettuce, red cabbage, white cabbage, red potatoes, red tomatoes, green tomatoes, green beans, sugar snap peas, green peppers, and cucumbers… the harvest was luscious and plenty. My husband jumped right in and started obeying the instructions his mother gave while Emily followed every move her grandmother made.

Sahara didn’t have much interest in the garden, but did find complete pleasure in running through an acre of land without anyone barking at her to stop or constantly reminding her of her boundaries. Her spirit was free and the land fed her soul! (The city girls still have the country innately in them that is for sure.) I think one of the things I miss about the country is the sense of freedom it offers.

I found quiet pleasure watching my husband not have a care in the world; for a day the autism seemed obsolete, computers did not need fixed, employees did not demand his time, and money was not a concern. The country air enveloped him as he educated his girls about his childhood stomping ground, including the cemetery down the lane where is father was laid to rest. The girls carefully pranced around his headstone telling their grandfather stories of a life he missed.

It was sad to leave and head back to the city. But, I presume, that if we didn’t we wouldn’t appreciate it as much as we do.
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Posted in autism, cabbage, Children's health, confidence, earth, emotional health, fathers, gardening, self empowerment, Siblings, Spirit, Stress, The Mother Consciousness | No comments

Monday, 3 August 2009

GFCF Apple Almond Coleslaw: Recipe of the Week

Posted on 14:18 by tripal h
After a trip to Grandma’s house, we came home with a jeep full of garden fresh produce. Among this priceless treasure were two wonderful large cabbages; one white and one red. I have to admit I was a bit overwhelmed and found myself just looking at them for 36 hours—After much thought I offer you this incredible coleslaw that we discovered from the cabbage my girls harvested with their grandmother.

3 Cups White Cabbage, finely chopped into I inch strips
2 Red Apples, Sliced and chopped into 1 inch strips
1 Sweet Onion, finely chopped
¼ Cup Roasted Sliced Almonds, chopped roughly
½ Cup Vegenaise
3 TB Apple Cider Vinegar
3 TB Sugar
Salt and Pepper to taste

In a large bowl toss cabbage, apples, onion and almonds.

In a separate bowl, mix vegenaise, vinegar, and Sugar. Pour dressing over cabbage. Add salt and pepper to taste and mix well. Serve chilled.

I still have a bunch of cabbage left over including a whole red one—so stay tuned for more cabbage creations from my kitchen.
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Posted in cabbage, coleslaw, GFCF recipe | No comments
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tripal h
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